New information can be hard for us to accept when it doesn't come to us the way we think it should.
Living Purely, Chapter 1, “The Keys of Freedom”
Our opinions about what help we need, what kind of help it is, and who provides it can be completely useless. Our work on Step Three can provide some useful strategies. We are often advised to "do the work and leave the results to our Higher Power" and to "pay attention to which doors open and which remain closed." When we find ourselves overly attached to an outcome or banging our heads against the same locked door, an open mind may be needed.
The classic allegory told at NA meetings over the years is that a flood drives a man to the roof of his house, where he prays for help. He refuses to enter the rescue boat or the helicopter that come to help him, telling them: "My God is protecting me"! The water continues to rise and the man is lost. In the afterlife, he attacks his creator for letting him die, to which God replies: "I sent a boat and a helicopter"!
There's a reason this story is a classic: it reveals some of the problems of closed-mindedness. One member described their flawed process this way: “I address my needs to the universe and ask for help, then I evaluate, judge, and reject the help that is offered. In the end it seems I'm often just looking for someone to agree with my bullshit. Keeping an open mind will come in handy here as well.
Attending out-of-town rallies demonstrates the benefit of an open mind. “I was only 25 kilometers away, but everything I was hearing sounded so fundamental,” shared one addict. "I realized that not knowing these members made me a better listener." Without mental stagnation about the messenger—purity, reputation, or other obstacles—it is easier to hear the message. Listening in the same way takes a little more effort closer to home. Applying the principle of anonymity helps us to set aside information that interferes with how we listen to others. Instead of listening to confirm our own perspectives, we can apply humility and open our minds to consider the experience, strength, and hope of others.
I'll accept the possibility that I don't always know what's best, making room to consider other people's ideas, no matter whose they are.
