One of the purest expressions of goodwill in NA is our sincere desire for the newcomer to gain his freedom.
Guiding Principles, Delivery First, “For Members”
In the early days of being clean (and for many of us for a long time afterward), it is difficult for us to accept the goodwill of the other members in the program as genuine. We think: Why the hell are all these people so happy to see me, like they know me or something? Some of us believe that NA members are trying to manipulate us in some way. Otherwise, why would they be so welcoming? We remain on the lookout for a crack in their game, but other people's goodwill can be hard to resist, especially when it hasn't been extended to us in a while. So we keep coming. Our journey to freedom from active addiction begins.
In NA, we do what others have done to stay pure, so we are encouraged to welcome those who are younger than us. “At first, I found it uncomfortable because I didn't feel like I was doing it with my heart,” shared one member. “But as I became more aware of the value of what had been given to me so freely, my desire to help other drug addicts grew. I honestly felt hopeful for them, and was really excited to see them when they came back. I didn't think I was even capable of feeling this way."
For many of us, this change is nothing short of a miracle. This new, sincere commitment to the well-being of other addicts represents freedom from the self-centeredness in which we have been trapped for so long. We know the program is working when we realize that we have hope for the success of other addicts as well.
Whether or not I feel goodwill deep in my heart today, the true hope for freedom—for others and for myself—exists within me far more than it ever has before. I can act on that hope today, no matter how I feel.
