…addiction makes us unique. Our personal stories may differ in individual patterns, but ultimately we all have the same thing in common. That common disease or disorder is addiction.
Main text, Chapter 8, ”We Recover”
By the time most of us walk into our first Narcotics Anonymous meetings, we are pros at the differences game. Within minutes of meeting someone for the first time, we can make a list of the ways in which we are both better and worse than them, the ways in which their opinions, concerns, and experiences have no bearing on our own lives and our own problems.
But something strange happens to most of us when we sit in an NA meeting. Whether it happens immediately or months or years later, we look around at a room full of people who look nothing like us, and we begin to realize that we are sitting in a room full of people who are just like us. We may not even realize it at the time, but anonymity is what makes this change.
Addiction comes with its own kind of horror and despair that we recognize when we hear each other share. We suffer the pain of wanting to stop using but not knowing how, of wanting to stop disappointing the people in our lives but seeing no other choice, of wanting to stop waking up disappointed in ourselves – again!!! – and yet, here we are, tired and sick of being tired and sick. We hear our fellow addicts share these experiences, experiences we know so well, and we know we are in the right place.
For some of us, connecting with NA members on the level of pain and suffering is the first time in a long, long time that we have felt any connection with other people. But it doesn’t stop there! At first, we only have the addiction in common, but as we stay and work the program, we soon have recovery in common. When we practice anonymity, we are able to have greater empathy and compassion for those around us. We see our similarities.
Our sense of connection with other NA members continues to grow. We meet members from other regions, cities, and countries – they share differently, but the message is the same. We have never met, but we know each other deeply. That is the blessing of being a recovering addict – the anonymity connects us all.
Addiction isolates me from other people and from myself. To reconnect, I will recognize what I have in common with other recovering addicts today and reach out to them.
